reality of boredom

  • I wish i could stay wrapped up in your sweatshirt all day. I woke up with an unbearable desire to be next to you, close to you , near you..i just miss you terribly - i want you here with me and can't stand the pain of it.

I wrote this yesterday as i sat in class and yes -it is meant to be this awful.. this is the reality of boredom and the thoughts that run through my head when i have all that time on my hands. Its also an excersise I had done with an acting coach to get you really plugged into whats going on around you.

  • I miss him
  • I am learning ..nothing except for how to act like your listening and ammused.
  • I am watching u-tube-documents of sitting in a chair?
  • I am listening to ramblings from a man
  • I want to go see a play
  • I feel cold and uncomfortable
  • I have a coffee
  • I want him
  • I hear cars outside and this noisy u-tube video playing
  • I see tacks on the wall and a black bug on the floor
  • I need lotion for my dry hands
  • I want to take pictures
  • I feel bored
  • I am wearing a sweater and boots
  • I have red nails
  • I am watching a man in a mask
  • I can't believe the image on the screen is a man in a bathroom stall
  • I hear a dripping faucet
  • I have a million other things I could be doing
  • I like rainy days like today
  • I still feel cold
  • I see kalidascope images
  • I hear a woman speaking in a foreign language
  • I want to take a boxing class or karate and learn how to really kick ass
  • I think Im losing my mind sometimes
  • I wish I was someplace else
  • I want more coffee
  • I am watching people lay ice blocks
  • I am really thinking whats the point?!!
  • I want a to have a pet wolf
  • I am watching" the shock of the new"
  • I am STILL in class
  • I will be working later tonight
  • I would rather be with him later
  • I wish I could leave right now
  • I want to ownΒ a black car
  • I want to go to New york for the day
  • I miss it..
  • I could use a massage
  • I see a man in horribly ugly glasses
  • I see students napping
  • I still feel bored an impatient
  • I cannot ever remember feeling this "out of control" boredom
  • I think this video is beyond DULL
  • I am going to fall asleep now
  • I cannot believe how much time this wastes
  • I see the clock
  • I hear a monnotone speaking voice
  • I want to go to sleep
  • I am not suprised students are asleep.

The END of that. Then I went on to make a list of a few things that make me happy

  • Music from the cranberries
  • actual cranberries
  • Green tea
  • Women's health magazine
  • Boots
  • Fall days
  • Rainy weather
  • Diet coke
  • Pumpkin spice candels
  • Warm blankets
  • Writing
  • Crying
  • music from Jem
  • Long drives
  • Scarves
  • outragous jewlery
  • bright nails
  • Dark hair
  • Intense eyes
  • The look of bitten lips-muted and not glossy
  • weddings
  • Love
  • STRONG coffee-I can't imagine me ever not loving espresso
  • The smell of winter
  • seeing your breath when you breathe

Song for today-love remains the same- Gavin Rossdale

God is Love

LO